Less than 2 years since we started on this journey (Info evening at LA in December 2011), this afternoon the panel recommended our match with the boy who we were linked with at end of August. That timeline includes a 9 month hiatus from Feb - Oct 2012 before the initial social worker recommended us forward. Since then the process has confounded us more than once - the most recent being under 4 weeks ago when we found ourselves with less than 4 weeks to go to panel rather than panel at end of October.
Monday, 30 September 2013
Sunday, 29 September 2013
The night before
Cannot believe we are now at this point. Trying to go to sleep night before matching panel - and in a weeks time it should be night before Intros start. I have 4 days left a work till I finish for at least 41 weeks. I had 2 weeks annual leave left which I am using up for first 2 weeks. Plan is the boy will be moved in by 21st Oct but both T & I are hoping for Friday or Saturday before then in our hearts if things go well. Should know more about plan tomorrow as our SW was hoping to have basic plan for us to see then.
Panel not till 2.30 pm so got to occupy ourselves for morning but we have plans that may involve car buying. T was a little shocked by how much boot space buggy took up. After some test diving have found car we want & hopefully the guy who has sold us last 3 cars will be able to do us a good deal on 18 month old version we have found which is specked as we would like at a price we can afford. Now to see what he offers for my current car which he sold us 4 years ago....
Short post today and not on theme unsurprisingly given we are not adopters yet.
Panel not till 2.30 pm so got to occupy ourselves for morning but we have plans that may involve car buying. T was a little shocked by how much boot space buggy took up. After some test diving have found car we want & hopefully the guy who has sold us last 3 cars will be able to do us a good deal on 18 month old version we have found which is specked as we would like at a price we can afford. Now to see what he offers for my current car which he sold us 4 years ago....
Short post today and not on theme unsurprisingly given we are not adopters yet.
Friday, 20 September 2013
Getting there
Well where are we as we get closer to matching panel and Introductions. After this evening we have a toddler bed in the boy's bedroom and a backpack to carry him in thanks to the local selling group.
On Sunday we got to collect a Maxi-Cosi Loola pushchair that I picked up for £25 on eBay. So think we are getting there in terms of furniture - need to pick up another Trofast unit from Ikea for dinning room and possibly one more for the boy's room depending on how many toys he comes with. We might get a better idea of that on Monday when we meet his foster carer. I met the medical advisor today (date and time changed with short notice so T couldn't come) who seemed to have no real concerns - she said he is a not a high risk child having never lived with birth family and only moved foster carers once at 5 weeks old. He has secure attachment to his foster carer which is good for us although we know transferring that attachment to us is going to take work.
Cannot believe that by 2 weeks time I will have stopped work and potentially in 4 weeks we will be looking at the boy moving in. I've had an interesting week at work - ended up sorting my own cover for a module that starts on Monday afternoon yesterday. Thankfully it wasn't too bad but I could slaughter the colleague whose responsibility it is - he has made so much work for us programme directors this last year it is unreal. Thankfully he hasn't reapplied for his position with merger so he will not be in position come 1st October.
It is coming fast now - and even though I do not start teaching next week I still have quite a bit to do at work. Getting there though but have agreed to write two sets of exam papers - which is fine as I shall be marking the summer ones probably anyway. Hoping over weekend round test driving cars to get some bedding for the bed. We're test driving as we want to decide what we want for when we do replace car in 4-6 months time. Decided to do it now without the boy in tow so it should be a little easier.
I am very excited and also very nervous. the baby daughter of one of the couples form our prep course (whose house we drive past every time we go anywhere) came home today and another couple must be getting close to moving elder son in. We were last to panel of 6 couples but will be 4th to matching panel..... As I have found throughout the last year the process likes to confound us and change our expectations of timing frequently. 17 days till I will have had first sight of the boy....
On Sunday we got to collect a Maxi-Cosi Loola pushchair that I picked up for £25 on eBay. So think we are getting there in terms of furniture - need to pick up another Trofast unit from Ikea for dinning room and possibly one more for the boy's room depending on how many toys he comes with. We might get a better idea of that on Monday when we meet his foster carer. I met the medical advisor today (date and time changed with short notice so T couldn't come) who seemed to have no real concerns - she said he is a not a high risk child having never lived with birth family and only moved foster carers once at 5 weeks old. He has secure attachment to his foster carer which is good for us although we know transferring that attachment to us is going to take work.
Cannot believe that by 2 weeks time I will have stopped work and potentially in 4 weeks we will be looking at the boy moving in. I've had an interesting week at work - ended up sorting my own cover for a module that starts on Monday afternoon yesterday. Thankfully it wasn't too bad but I could slaughter the colleague whose responsibility it is - he has made so much work for us programme directors this last year it is unreal. Thankfully he hasn't reapplied for his position with merger so he will not be in position come 1st October.
It is coming fast now - and even though I do not start teaching next week I still have quite a bit to do at work. Getting there though but have agreed to write two sets of exam papers - which is fine as I shall be marking the summer ones probably anyway. Hoping over weekend round test driving cars to get some bedding for the bed. We're test driving as we want to decide what we want for when we do replace car in 4-6 months time. Decided to do it now without the boy in tow so it should be a little easier.
I am very excited and also very nervous. the baby daughter of one of the couples form our prep course (whose house we drive past every time we go anywhere) came home today and another couple must be getting close to moving elder son in. We were last to panel of 6 couples but will be 4th to matching panel..... As I have found throughout the last year the process likes to confound us and change our expectations of timing frequently. 17 days till I will have had first sight of the boy....
Sunday, 15 September 2013
Relaxing
Well the theme for todays #waso is relax. Which is a good thing to tell me at moment as I try to get everything done in 4-6 weeks less time than I thought I had. 3 weeks today (13/9) by this time (7pm) I will have finished work for at least 41 weeks....
Relaxation at moment for me is usually playing computer games (MMOs mainly with our friend P) - nothing better than hitting stuff after a bad day at work :D I started playing MMOs about 7 years back with Lord of the Rings Online (big Tolkien fan) and have played a number both seriously (raiding regularly etc.) and these days much more casually (pottering around levelling and doing bits & pieces). We brought lifetime subs to LOTRO so have nothing to pay there and tend to stick to free-to-play MMOs now.
Relaxation at moment for me is usually playing computer games (MMOs mainly with our friend P) - nothing better than hitting stuff after a bad day at work :D I started playing MMOs about 7 years back with Lord of the Rings Online (big Tolkien fan) and have played a number both seriously (raiding regularly etc.) and these days much more casually (pottering around levelling and doing bits & pieces). We brought lifetime subs to LOTRO so have nothing to pay there and tend to stick to free-to-play MMOs now.
However beyond MMOs relaxing is also reading and various crafts: cross-stitch embroidery & card-making mainly. Reading has been one of my main activities since I was 2 1/2 & Mum taught me to read as she apparently got fed up with me correcting her when she made a mistake reading to me (I have a very good memory). As she puts it I haven't stopped reading since - it is something I still enjoy doing and I always have at least one book on the go - often 2 or 3 - one actual book, one on the Kindle and one on the Kindle app on my iPad.
Embroidery is something Mum started me on when I was 10/11 and I nearly always have something on the go. Takes me forever to do one but it is something I tend to do while watching the little bit of TV that I do. The picture in this post is of an embroidery I finished a few years back (2007) which I gave to Grandma for Christmas that year. it has come back to me after her death earlier this year.
Card-making is something I just have periodic blitzes at - made a load of Christmas cards a few weeks back so we had a stock before Christmas crept up on us. This was when we thought our boy would be moving in with us mid to late November. That all changed when we got the phone call last week.
Still playing odd bits of MMOs at moment but we are using a lot of our spare time getting jobs finished round the house. The boy's room is mainly finished - other than something for him to sleep in as we are waiting to hear from FC about that. But we have sorted out the three laundry bags of clothes from my sister (whose elder son is 2 yrs older and younger son is 10 months younger). So there are clothes in the wardrobe, in the chest of drawers and in the cupboard. Plus many more (larger sizes) packed away in vaccie bags on shelf in wardrobe. We've installed and got working an IP camera to monitor room and got two of the Ikea Trofast units in and fixed to wall. Expecting to need more but waiting to see - will sort early on in Intros if needed. Plus we want one in dining room for toys downstairs.
Today's (Sunday 15/9) plan is a quick trip out to local outlet place as I need more casual shoes - I own one pair of walking & my walking boots and that is it other than work shoes. Come back via Costco as we need coffee beans for machine, and then loft sorting time. We brought this house of my parents and there was stuff left in loft then (mainly children's stuff I will admit). Plus my brother lived with us for about 2 years split over two periods so we have several boxes belonging to him that he can have now he has his own house. This should free up some space for stuff we will need to store.
Little worried how much the boy will come with as been told my his SW that his FC is not planning to take any more little ones - just to see out the 2 she has on long-term foster care. So we could end up with loads - hence the need to make sure we have space. My in-laws laughed yesterday when we were discussing this with them. Thankfully after my sister's experience they seem to be more accepting of what we are saying about things like not picking the boy up initially or giving him anything. Then again my sister-in-law is a yr 2 (was reception) teacher in a deprived area of Liverpool so has experience with the social services & foster care system. She also seems to be getting herself clued up on adoption which helps us no end.
Ok this post has veered somewhat around and taken me nearly 2 days to complete (now Sunday morning) but that is my life at moment. 13 more working days to go before it all starts.....
Wednesday, 4 September 2013
Reeling once more
T has decided the adoption process likes to confound us. There we were happy we had a link and expecting a late Oct/early Nov panel date. That was until today when in Conwy. T tried to answer a call from our SW but failed - she left a message asking him to ring back which he did promptly.
Our son's SW wants panel on 30th Sept and Intros to start a week later as his FC is going away for a week from 26th Oct and they feel respite to Intros would not be a good thing - could we mange this. Cue two people on Conwy harbour front hurriedly phoning work while on holiday. Fine for me - T has the complication of Eid-al-Adha which is predicted to be around 15th Oct. One cannot get pharmacist locums where we live around either Eid. Cue call back to our SW who understood this and went away to talk to her manager and also medical advisor as the short notice might mean going to panel without meeting her.
We wandered round the Castle at Conwy and then down to Bodnant Gardens. Driving back through Snowdonia at a point we actually had signal, we got an email from our SW telling us she had spoken to her stand-in manager (annual leave for actual manager) who felt we could manage without T for 3 days during second week of Intros and she had also got us a medical advisor appointment the week before proposed panel. We then went looking for phone signal around foot of Snowdon - ended up in car park in Llanberis. Promptly spoke to our SW again as she phoned following up on email to check about FC meeting times. Then T forwarded email to his line manager and company boss, following up by speaking to line manager directly. Meanwhile I finally told my mother (issues with her spreading too many details round family so is kept a bit out of loop) that we had a link and the timescale. Phoned Dad (he is away for work) before sending emails to three people at work who needed to know.
Given work a fine conundrum to solve - I was teaching 2 modules in 6 weeks - now I am not with under 3 weeks to go before term starts. The decision to go with new timescale is absolutely right as we do not want our son disrupted as much as respite could do. Ok have around 4 1/2 weeks to do stuff we thought we had 9 weeks+ to deal with but we will get there. What happens happens for a reason and this match just feels so right to us.
Our son's SW wants panel on 30th Sept and Intros to start a week later as his FC is going away for a week from 26th Oct and they feel respite to Intros would not be a good thing - could we mange this. Cue two people on Conwy harbour front hurriedly phoning work while on holiday. Fine for me - T has the complication of Eid-al-Adha which is predicted to be around 15th Oct. One cannot get pharmacist locums where we live around either Eid. Cue call back to our SW who understood this and went away to talk to her manager and also medical advisor as the short notice might mean going to panel without meeting her.
We wandered round the Castle at Conwy and then down to Bodnant Gardens. Driving back through Snowdonia at a point we actually had signal, we got an email from our SW telling us she had spoken to her stand-in manager (annual leave for actual manager) who felt we could manage without T for 3 days during second week of Intros and she had also got us a medical advisor appointment the week before proposed panel. We then went looking for phone signal around foot of Snowdon - ended up in car park in Llanberis. Promptly spoke to our SW again as she phoned following up on email to check about FC meeting times. Then T forwarded email to his line manager and company boss, following up by speaking to line manager directly. Meanwhile I finally told my mother (issues with her spreading too many details round family so is kept a bit out of loop) that we had a link and the timescale. Phoned Dad (he is away for work) before sending emails to three people at work who needed to know.
Given work a fine conundrum to solve - I was teaching 2 modules in 6 weeks - now I am not with under 3 weeks to go before term starts. The decision to go with new timescale is absolutely right as we do not want our son disrupted as much as respite could do. Ok have around 4 1/2 weeks to do stuff we thought we had 9 weeks+ to deal with but we will get there. What happens happens for a reason and this match just feels so right to us.
Sunday, 1 September 2013
Photos & friends
Had a great time yesterday as we attended the wedding (ok technically civil partnership) of one of our great friends. We actually left home on Thursday - spent the night in Chester and then drove to Ynys Môn after a brief shopping trip round Chester.
However Thursday was a bizarre day in many ways - I was all set to use public transport to get to work so I could go straight to T's work in the evening. Then had a text from social worker at around 7.30 to tell us she would drop the photos of our linked LO off during the day. So plans changed as we wanted to share the photos with our close friends. I drove to work, came home picked up photos (and a customs duty demand from Royal Mail) and made trip back into town to join T. Even that was slightly diverted as went to the Royal Mail office to pick up parcel as I knew it was the earrings I wanted for my outfit.
However Thursday was a bizarre day in many ways - I was all set to use public transport to get to work so I could go straight to T's work in the evening. Then had a text from social worker at around 7.30 to tell us she would drop the photos of our linked LO off during the day. So plans changed as we wanted to share the photos with our close friends. I drove to work, came home picked up photos (and a customs duty demand from Royal Mail) and made trip back into town to join T. Even that was slightly diverted as went to the Royal Mail office to pick up parcel as I knew it was the earrings I wanted for my outfit.
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